Panic

So I just realised I'm an adult.

Okay, not an adult exactly. But I'm on my way. Being here in New Zealand is/was kind of a way to put off the inevitable adulthood. Granted, it will also better my career blah blah blah, but mostly, it's another few years to live in excusable poverty and fun. But, my time here is drawing to a close. I have about four months left. Four! Months! Left! Then I have to go back to the States and get a job, an apartment, a car, and then I'll have to start being financially responsible. Hopefully sooner rather than later.

I know that adulthood sneaks up on you and your capabilities. Like, high school seemed like a big step the summer before I started. But my wise, wise parents told me that it was designed so that I'd be ready. If I wanted to go to high school as a 6 year old, there would have been problems. But you take on more and more so that you can take on more and more. But, graduation was a big ol' step in the adult direction. But I blew it off. "Take that, Graduation, I'm blowing this popsicle stand for a foreign land." Now it's come back again.

It doesn't help that most of my friends are already adults. I'll get back and be complaining about my nerves of having - gasp - my very own classroom and they'll respond, "Dude (yeah, they'll say dude), I've been teaching for two years."

The worst part is that while I fret about it now, it so won't be a big deal. It comes in gradually. Look I have my own apartment. Sweet, tick that item off the list. And now for my car. And oh look! It's my first day of teaching. Then - wham - I'll have been teaching for ten years and I'll suddenly be keeping tissues up my sleeve.

Adulthood, you sneaky fiend.