...It Makes Me Dream

As I was walking home the other night, I looked up at the stars and realized I hadn't done this since I got here. At first, I was frustrated because obviously astronomy had taught me nothing because I couldn't identify one star. Then I remembered what my dad told me before I left, that I'd be seeing stars I had never seen before in my life. Well, that's pretty friggin' cool. I took a moment to look a little crazy as I stood in the middle of my street at night staring at the sky. I had a moment of what I like to call deja who? I've had several of these since I got here. One was when my friend and I were legitimately in a hostel talking about going skydiving the next day. I just stopped midsentence (yes, I can hear the jokes-- I do stop midsentence quite frequently) and was in shock. Who am I? When did I become the girl who didn't plan ahead enough to have to sneak into someplace for a place to sleep for the night? When did I become the girl who goes skydiving? All of a sudden, you feel this real distance from the person you've become. You feel almost like you've been watching a movie you've been acting in, but it's not actually your life.

I had another deja who moment staring up at those stars. Who is this girl staring at stars she's never seen? Who's this girl who moved to friggin' New Zealand?? Don't get me wrong, I am insanely happy here (money situation no longer plagues me; long story) but sometimes I am shock at the way that life turns out. I am also interested to hear if anyone else has ever had a deja who moment and if we can make that a term. I do hope we all have these moments because they also bring a twinge of pride. The reason I am so shocked at what I've done is because who woulda thought? Goes back to my favorite quote of the moment -- If we did all the things we were capable of doing, we would literally astound ourselves. (Thomas Edison)

PS- anyone who gets the reference of the title gets ten extra credit points...