Twilight Zone

Okay, for the sake of easy and entertaining writing, I am going to combine these odds factors of my recent past into one day of weirdness. Yes, I have altered the truth of series of events in my blog for better reading. Whatev - you totally know you do it casual conversation on a regular basis.

Today is weird. It's weird for a lot of reasons which I will describe to you. I didn't sleep well last night. Some dream where I was saving the world from pizza restaurants (perhaps my latest health kick is getting a bit extreme) caused me to have restless sleep. Then I woke up a minute before my alarm, which isn't weird but an inherited godsend from my dad, but I hadn't set my alarm. While I work out most days, I don't work out on soccer days and today happens to be a soccer day. Also, I have nothing to write today. I have written approximately one thousand (quality) words a day for the past week and a half for a couple papers. The due dates have passed. I was now awake with no working out or paper writing to do. So I went grocery shopping. I needed some more yogurt and muesli anyhow. I had to bundle up, but got to wear my sunglasses due to copious amounts of bright sun. You know, sun that was intermittent with pending doom clouds and splatterings of rain. Sure, sure. Totally normal. There was a hoola hoop in the Leith and a dalmation seagull on my way to the store.

At the store, I found the meat imitation section that I had somehow missed for the past 5 months. A six pack of soy dogs (don't you judge me) was 12 dollars. Are you freakin' kidding me? I will buy the chickpeas and mash 'em into dog shapes all on my own for less. Also, a regular sized bottle of multi vitamins is 18 dollars. Needless to say, I huffed and said out loud, "You gotta be kidding me!" and went on my merry way. The grocer asked me where I was from and I told her Wisconsin and she was shocked that I was American. Let's not fool ourselves. I have no resemblance of an accent and am horrible conscious when I have to pronounce the 'h' in herb or say tomAHto instead of tomAYto. I was buying a Cosmo. Please, honey, don't flatter me. I reek of Americanism. I returned home to find my computer off and closed, although I didn't remember doing it. I also had no desire to turn on said computer. This is unfathomable. Then, as I was suiting up to come to work for my one hour, it started raining, monsoon-wind flared up, and it hailed for a bit. However, when I stepped outside, all precipitation and wind stopped. And none of the mail in mailbox was actually for me today.

It's a weird freakin' day. And it's only noon. Maybe this is what my life is like without naps. I don't like it; don't like it one bit. My plan of attack is to retaliate with such a long afternoon of reading and napping that when I wake up, it will seem like a new, run of the mill, normal day.