This Explains So Much!

My horoscope for today, under the heading of love, said this:

"For the first time in this lifetime, Jupiter is getting cosmic support from Uranus as he moves through your romantic sector. This will last for the next 5 days and will be repeated again next May and August, for a few days and then never again. Expect serendipitous moments, choreographed by fate."

Well, no wonder! So fate hasn't been backing up my love life. At all. My one shot at fate-destined love is for the next five days, another five days next year... and then never again! You know, considering horoscopes are a lot of crapola anyway, wouldn't you put something optimistic? Do I really want to read this one again? "Quick - find true love in the next five days, or start buying cats, crazy lady!" Sigh.